There's a spider in our upstairs landing window who last night completely removed her web in order to build an entirely new (and larger) one. I've seen a few of our house spiders do this recently and it reminds me of the process of death and rebirth.

This was perhaps the source of the bitter-sweet sheer exhilaration that accompanied the end of most romantic relationships I have had. It always hurt but there was also always an accompanying awareness of the blank slate that was being re-presented to me.

Adjusting to married life and no longer having that sort of renewal to 'fall back on' has been an interesting process and one I am not too certain I'm completely done with yet either. I am not sure it's a process that ever really ends as like so many other aspects of life, a marriage must be maintained, not just left to it's own devices.

While I have my daily frustrations with my partner and my family and life in general, I am also periodically reminded of just how very lucky I am. My husband makes me laugh every day. He loves me and our children. He worries about providing for us and does his best to.

I am worried about the near future these days, but not so much about the farther future because I know that whatever we must go through now we will come out the other side of, better for it. What we have to go through I cannot say, all I know is, we need to make some big changes. We have started, but only barely, and there is so much more breaking down to do before we can begin to build again.


In the mean time... I hope my muse stays close.

On the other side of the world...


...well not quite really. In fact one amazing thing about Scotland is it's a bit like both my birthplace (Virginia USA) and the place I've called home most of my life (Yukon CANADA). I like that. Can't say the economy is any better here but where is it any better eh? The wee ones are well (or well enough anyway, one's got a cold currently) and the husband has plans to better himself. Meanwhile I am feeling out a new country.

The hard part is it's a bit like starting all over, being fresh out of the 'rents place and facin' the big wide world again as I don't have a UK license (and have yet to drive on the left side of the road anyway) or a means of transportation that works easily with little ones. And I can't really work right now so I really feel a bit vulnerable.

Gettin' over it though. Starting to settle. If we can just get a home with a back garden for the boys to play in I'll really feel like we have a starting point to work from. That and no one living downstairs from us who can't stand our kids running around overtop of their head.

The art is coming but slowly. Still, a trickle is better than nowt eh?

s t a r f l o w e r p o l l e n

There is something called 'The Long Dark Journey of the Soul' (not to be confused with The Long Dark Tea Time of the Soul' and while I am not engaged in a very serious one (or perhaps I am?) I am definitely experiencing a bit of an overcast hike...

However, there are hints of creativity emerging from within and from time to time something actually gets created! Aside from dabbling in beaded jewelry, I have recently launched an 'Online Adoptable' through the community of PonyIsland which seems to be going well; The Lepus Draconis (or Ti'rhyn) which are creatures from within my larger conceptual worlds associated with the Starborne creation matrix, the Realms of Arkaedea... which will hopefully some day become more cohesive! <3

This all is occuring in the midst of my attempt to move to the UK in order to keep my family together. My husband is from Scotland (and currently over there working so that he can prove he's able to sponsor/support us) and while we want to live in both places, our attempts to go through the process of his Canadian Residency have been largely tiring and expensive. We've decided to move over the water to be with his family and to allow him to find better work (and more easily as he won't need the VISA to work over there... instead will! but I will also mostly be home with the babes. So, I am hoping to cultivate my creative endeavours and perhaps, just maybe, work towards an independent business based upon them. <3

Constellations : my themed galleries suffering from lack of attention


Once Upon a Time : where I used to 'lay' / my old DA

90% of my time is now controlled by the babies.
The other 10% is dictated by the state of my life and the work that needs to be done.
I suspect it will be some time before I can spend quality time on art once more. :/
But... I'm mostly ok with this. <3

s t a r f l o w e r p o l l e n

Hmn... I am having SUCH the strangest problem.
I can't see most submissions full view.
Small view shows up fine but when I click full view it shows up blank. If I try to view image it gives me a page that says it's having problems accessing what I guess is the sit/node that the full views are hosted on. Anyone else experiencing this? It REALLY impacts my ability to view and enjoy people's work!

Constellations : my themed galleries suffering from lack of attention


Once Upon a Time : where I used to 'play' (aka: my old account)